[skinny soju & ravioli]

So back in January I decreed 2014 my last "fat year".

And like the vast majority of Americans was super dedicated for a week, tops.

Then it just kind of...stopped.

To be fair, things tapered slowly off not because I wanted them to, but because studying for the Bar and working full time was far more work than originally anticipated. I know I could have still made healthy food choices but honestly I was so focused on getting through each day that I just didn't do it.

Once the Bar ended my resolve partially returned. I wanted to change. I did. But not really. You see, I just wasn't willing to let go of the bad habits I'd picked up. They were too comforting. So I clung to them and cursed every Monday morning when the scale didn't move and my clothes still fit the same.

Then last week I got an email at work. A coworker was starting a weight loss challenge. 

The rules are simple: pay a $20 "entry fee" and weigh in every Wednesday morning. If you gain weight or stay the same, you pay $2. If you skip the weigh in, you pay $1. At the end of the challenge (June 4), the person with the highest percentage of weight loss gets all the money. 

With our entry fees alone, the pot is sitting at $210. 

That's pretty solid incentive to lose weight. 

Oh and one more thing: after this Wednesday there's no backing out. You're committed. 

I was hesitant at first about joining in. I said it was because I didn't want to cough up the $20 entry fee. But honestly I didn't want to do it because I know that participating would me changing my habits or facing the embarrassment of paying into the pot every week. 

I bit the bullet and paid up last Wednesday.

This week, it paid off. I lost weight. Quick side note: I'm not going to post any numbers. I don't want someone to have the reaction I once did reading a blog about weight loss. You see, I was reading this post and the author was talking about when she reached her heaviest weight she decided to make a change because of how uncomfortable she felt. The number she shared was significantly less than what I weighed at the time. Ouch. We're around the same height so it stung all the more. Immediately I began to beat myself up. If that was fat, then what was I? A hippo? I don't want anyone to feel the way I did that day so you won't see numbers here.


Even from day 1, I knew that I had made the right choice. Here's the thing about eating healthy: you just feel better. All the freaking time. No more guilt about food choices. No more bloat. No more food-related fatigue. It's awesome.

There's something I've been telling myself everyday.

I'm in this for life.

Not for the pool this summer.
Not for my friends' wedding in Labor Day.

For life.

Put a deadline on me at work or in school and you can bet your bottom dollar I'll work my tail off to meet it. Put a deadline on me to lose weight and you can bet your bottom dollar I'll miss it. I'm funny that way.

So this is about a life long change. This is about a healthy life. This is about enjoying every day without worrying about my health (the part I can control at least). This is about being around for years to come. This is about more than my appearance. This is about the rest of my life.

Sure it would be wonderful to hit my goal weight in say 3 months but that's just not sustainable.

So be looking for more weight loss posts as I go about this journey.

Will you join me? 

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